Mulan... Is that you??

Mulan?? Not quite because this story hasn't been Disneyized. Yes, Disneyized is a real word. Oxford English just added to their 2013 edition of the dictionary. The word appears between “poetic license” and “completely made up crap”. Yes, Oxford has started to include word phrases in their dictionary, not that anyone uses a paper dictionary any more.

This is one of the lesser gods who stands at either side of Matsu. I never did hear exactly what their purpose or their names. This is Matsu herself. I am not certain which one of the 10 statues is actually Matsu. In addition, they are behind glass and you could not get very close. On a interesting note. The statues all look very similar and their faces are covered with golden chain veils.

Mazu, or Mat-Su, Chinese Goddess of the Sea, is the story of an extraordinary girl who became a goddess. The Chinese goddess Mazu has many names and titles. Known in different regions as Matsu, Ma-Tsu, A-ma, Tianhou, and other names, with numerous titles that include "Motherly Matriarch", "Kuan Yin of the Southern Sea", "Daughter of the Dragon", and "Empress of Heaven". Although some experts feel she may be a version of the older goddess Kuan Yin (who is better known in most western countries), Mazu is deeply rooted in the hearts of her people, especially coastal areas in the East, and is best known as the "Goddess of the Sea". In folk tradition it is believed that, when facing great difficulty, you can call her by the name "Mazu" and she will immediately come to your rescue. However, if you call out to her addressing her as the "Empress of Heaven", she will take time to put on her finest clothing and will be delayed in coming to your aid! Just like a woman! The Chinese goddess Mazu originated with the adoration of a young woman named Lin Mo Niang who had performed numerous miracles during her short life. A kind-hearted girl with a vast knowledge of Chinese medicine. She was known as a healer, curing the sick while she taught people how to prevent illness and injury. Many of the miracles she performed involved quelling storms at sea, so it is hardly surprising she is known as the protector of seafaring people. Mazu was born on a small island in the straits of Taiwan off the coast of southeastern China in 960 A.D. Her middle-aged parents, the Lins, already had six children, only one of them a girl. Her mother prayed to the goddess of mercy, Kuan Yin, for another daughter. Hearing her fervent prayers, Kuan Yin came to her in a dream; she gave her a flower blossom to eat. She conceived the next day. The baby was named Lin Niang. Remember in China the surname is used first, so in English, but following Chinese practices, we would say Smith, John. I used to think it was the rest of the world who was backward and different. But I hate to be the one to let everyone in on this little known fact; it is America who is backward and different. Sorry thoughts for another time… At the birth of Lin Niang the room was filled with a brilliant light and the fragrance of fresh blossoms. As a newborn, she was strangely silent. Alert and healthy, she did not cry at all during the first month of her life, leading her parents to nickname her Mo (which means "silent"). As she grew it quickly became apparent that Lin Mo was gifted with remarkable intelligence and a photographic memory. Supernatural powers were soon to become apparent as well. Visiting a Buddhist temple when she was four years old and standing before a statue of the goddess Kuan Yin, she was given second sight. At the age of ten she began to study Buddhism, and when she was 13 she was accepted as a student by an elderly priest.

Marine folklore is filled with tales of catastrophes averted when the goddess Mazu, dressed in red, appeared to sailors as a warning that unseen storms were rising and that their voyages should be postponed. Many a seafarer has recounted times when the goddess Mazu appeared as a bright light on their troubled ships, arriving just in time to calm a storm and save their lives. Some said that Lin Mo could actually ride clouds across the ocean, and appear in the flesh to rescue them.   Like Kuan Yin, the goddess Matsu decided not to marry in spite of immense social pressure to do so. Two warriors of great fame became inflamed with lust when they saw the beautiful young girl and wanted to "marry" her. She challenged the pair to fight her for the privilege, insisting that they would have to do her bidding forever if she won. Remember learning the martial arts have long been a part of the training of Buddhist priests and undoubtedly was part of her studies as well. All I have to say at this point is yet another example of men believing they know everything about women. You can imagine how that fight ended. General Chien-li-yen (Eyes that See a Thousand Miles) and General Shun Feng Erh (Ears that Can Hear the Wind) died that day during the fight that took place on Mount Peach Blossom. To this day, the pair of defeated warriors are by her side in statuary in her temples. The is General Shun Feng Erh. It is not clear weather this general was elevated to the status of god after Matsu killed him. He and General Chien-li-yen are in every temple dedicated to the goddess of the open sea. This is the one who can hear the wind. The ears on this statue are huge.  This is General Chien-li-yen. This is the warrior who can see for a thousand miles. The children here are told to be careful of what they say and do. These two gods catch you and you will be sent to one of the 18 levels of hell.     Lin Mo's died at the age of 28. She climbed mountain and when she reached the top was encircled by clouds of dense fog. The sound of enchanting celestial music flied the air and she was carried into the heavens in a golden glow of light. Where she was last seen, a great rainbow appeared. And this was God’s promise to never flood the Earth again. Ooops wrong religion. The rainbow in the Chinese culture symbolizes good fortune.   Jing-Xi’s Thought of the Day… Showing the proper respect for other cultures does not insinuate a belief in their religious practices. I am certain it is viewed as narrow minded to believe in one thing and only in one way. But it is that narrow mindedness which gets one through the nights. I have arrived at the forgone conclusion tradition is deeply rooted in every society. People of different cultures take offence when their beliefs are flippantly questioned or taken as jest. It does sadden my heart to think people rely on luck for answers to their prayers. How does one sleep at night depending on nothing or luck?   The outside of the temple. Under this roof what would have been the treasury in old times. The guy on top is a scary god who guards Matsu's money. I am not sure why she needs money, but you get the idea. Same scary guy. I never did get this god's name. I just know the natives are very afraid of his wrath. More temple adornment. Hand crafted and painted by dedicated and talented worshipers. This is outside the main doors. It is a giant incense burner. A temple priest whose only job is to make sure there are always stick of incense burning, even if there are no patrons in the temple. There are smaller versions of this holder scattered through out the temple. My first thought was maybe someone finally realized how smelly this country truly is decided to make it smell nicer. I am sure that is the reason. :)  This is a giant golden statue of a dragon looking sea serpent scary animal thing. I believe it is encased in glass because it is made from precious metals. The dragon sea serpent rotates on some type of lazy susan, for lack of a better term. The face of this creature looks fierce and is meant to be a warning to evil doers. The stone carving behind the case fetches the people who have committed a wrong. I am not sure what type of animal it is supposed to be, but it looks part dog, lion, and dragon. I guess if the wrong doer doesn't want to come quietly, the dog lion thing will devour the person whole on the spot. Talk about twisted bed time stories. It is a wonder to me how Asian mothers get their children to sleep at all. "You better shut your eyes and go to sleep right now. Or the dragon sea serpent's dog lion thingy will come and eat you up!" That would put them right to sleep...   This man is filing his "wish" which is what we would call a prayer. I am still very confuse about this part of the temple experience. I did get a proper explanation, but... From what I gather, the person makes a wish and if it is of the private nature they file it in the drawers you see in the picture. I wonder why a "god" would need a filing system? There are many small statues spread out through the temple. I do not know if they have some purpose, other than decoration. This one is a lion and sits in front of hand carved columns. It is a truly amazing sight. Another hand carved column. This is of trees and fish. This is the god of water, or so I was told. The statue is behind glass and the red lights in back look like eyes staring at you. This is another god meant to scare people into doing good. The table in front has food offerings and there is an incense holder behind the offerings. This is yet another god. I am not sure which one he is, but he is also behind glass. There are offerings on a table in front to this god too. This one doesn't look so scary and mean. I guide said a prayer and bowed to this god several times. I was so excited and overwhelmed by the things to see, I was pointing at the gods as I asked questions. I was told pointing at the gods offended them greatly and I needed to apologize. I apologized for the offence and we moved on.     This woman is praying to Matsu. They light the incense, place it in the holder and bow to the god. They say their prayer quietly and bow after every request. I watched this woman bow over 15 times. Also I want to point out the neon sign up high and in front of her. Most of the large temples have these signs and are lighted by neon signs at night. Maybe churches in America need to adopt this practice. The sign could say. Hey heathens! This is a church. Come in here, repent of your sins, or you will go to hell. Oh and by the way, Jesus loves you. Gold inlay art work on the doors of the temple. This picture was huge. This is of a guy who no one seemed to know. They just know he guards the door to the temple and his wife is on the other door. I did not get a picture of her because the door was propped open. This is where the temple worshipers go to buy their "gifts". This is a picture of the incense area. The red packages smell very good and I bought some to bring back to the dorm with me. This is paper fake money. The practice is to burn money so your ancestors will have enough money to buy their way into heaven. In one of my last posts there was a picture of a pig and a fire. This is what they were burning in the fire. Behind the collection box are gold looking tags on a red cord. These are wish tags. I am not sure the natives call them wish tags, but this is their purpose. People buy the tags, write their wish down, and hang it on a special column in the temple. If the great goddess Matsu believes that you should be granted your wish, it comes true. She does not grant all of the wishes, but it is said that she does guard them to keep them safe.   This is the collection box. This is similar to the offering plate in American churches. The marked difference is that you get a tangible item for your donation and every item costs 200NT. This is roughly 7 USD.  This is a picture of the temple outside. It had hand carved decorations every where you looked. I thought this one to be especially neat looking. The decorations all have special meanings, but with so many it was hard to keep them all straight. What I took away from the explanations was the patrons live in fear of their gods. This is where the patrons can go to burn the paper money. I was told this is an environmentally friendly way to burn the paper money, but some people still prefer the old method. The old method being burning it in the streets. This is the entry gate to the temple. Even the gate has some sort of special meaning. This is a bigger version of the dog, dragon, lion thing sitting behind the dragon sea serpent thing. There are two of these huge carvings sitting on either side of the gate to Matsu's temple. The giant dog, dragon, lion thing are called imagination animals. They sit on either side of the gates to temples. The natives believe the animals are put there to remind you of the reason behind your temple visit. It is said they help you clear you mind of the daily stresses, worries, but most importantly they help you focus on worshipping the gods properly in the temple. (Thank you Rachel for the help in explaining the dog, dragon, lion thing. I love you sweet girl!)  If this is what comes to get you when you do a bad thing. I have seen the light! I am a reformed bad deed doer. Holy cow this thing looks scary. This is the wish column I mentioned above. This is where you can hang your wish. The word wish here does not mean a hope or desire for something to pass. What the word wish actually refers to is a prayer. These are prayers people have said and hung up here. I guess in a way these could be wishes, but wish sounds to me like taking a chance. I was told I could make a wish and hang it up, if I wanted. I politely declined. Our guide asked why I wouldn't want my wishes to be considered by Matsu. I politely explained my trouble with apologizing to the gods for pointing. I only apologized because I did not want to offend the real people in the temple who take their religion seriously. I told him I believed that it would be even more of an offence if I were to make a wish and not believe in any of the gods. He agreed and we moved on.   These are prayer dice and they are sitting on another collection box. The sign here also says 200NT. This buys you three rolls of the prayer dice. They do have a Chinese name, but was very difficult to pronounce, let alone recall at a later date. The name of these items is not subject matter. The subject is what the natives do with these items. As I mentioned above you are allowed three (3) rolls per 200NT. Again, for those who rode the short bus to school, that is roughly 7$ USD. They take the dice in hand, hold them very near their mouth and whisper their prayer/wish, bow to the goddess Matsu three (3) times, and cast the dice. One side of the die is rounded and one side is flat. You want the dice to land round side up and flat side up, so one of each. If your cast comes up one round side and one flat side up this means your wish/prayer is granted. If you roll anything else you just pick the prayer dice up, make your wish, bow, and cast them again. I watched a man drop 1000NT (approx. 35$ USD) into the collection box. This bought him five (5) separate turns with the dice. I don't speak blah blah so I am not sure what he was praying for or if it was the same prayer. At this point my true nature started to bubble through my self control. I feared I would make a sarcastic comment and offend my guide and everyone in the temple. In utter disbelief and sadness, over the fate of the native's souls I left Matsu's temple. I am not sure I want to go back to a temple. How reassuring can people find it to blindly put their trust and faith into a institution that reminds me of Las Vegas. If I don't roll snake eyes, god won't listen to my request...

Trick, but no Treat...

 "When hinges creak, in door-less chambers. And strange and frightening sounds echo through the halls. Whenever candlelight’s flicker, where the air is deathly still, that is the time when ghosts are present. Practicing their terror, with ghoulish delight!" Welcome! Foolish Mortals, to the haunted mansion, I am your host, your ghost host. Hmmmm. Our tour begins here, in this gallery. Here where you see paintings of some of our guests, as they appeared in their corruptible, mortal state. Kindly step all the way in please, and make room for everyone. There’s no turning back now... Your cadaverous parlor, betrays an aura of foreboding, almost as though you sense a disquieting metamorphosis. Is this Haunted room actually stretching? Or is it your imagination, hmm?? And consider this dismaying observation; this chamber had no windows, and no doors. Which offers you this chilling challenge, to find A WAY OUT! HAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!! Of course, there's always my way..."

 

I love the Haunted Mansion. My Gina and I used to be able to recite the entire script along with the ghost host. I am sure we drove other riders crazy, but it wasn’t as if we actually knew any of the other riders. We would even scream on cue. It is a shame Disneyland doesn’t award acting trophies, because we would have been a shoo in for sure.  “And the Emmy for acting scared and aiding the Ghost Host, goes to (pause for dramatic effect) Jing-Xi and her Gina! “Who, us? (acting shocked that we actually won) Oh Oh…Thank you for this honor... You like us… You really like us!”

Who doesn’t like Halloween? I love the time of year when the weather turns cool at night, but warm during the day. The leaves begin to change colors and eventually float almost magically to the ground. The smell of autumn permeates the air and every child knows Halloween is close at hand. Being in the Far East I expected Halloween to be celebrated differently, if celebrated at all. In Taiwan the smell of autumn does not exist and there are no real leaves to turn colors. I have been informed numerous times palm tree leaves do not count towards this endeavor. With the disappointment of the absentee autumn still weighing heavily on my heart Halloween was a hop, skip, and scream away.

My fellow English teachers and I were asked to decorate the Kid’s Happy Land for the big day. I believed the request to be odd, but presumed the decorations were for the benefit of the students. I was confident we would be asked to not hang any witches or devils, this being a Catholic school. However, no such demand was made. In fact we constructed two separate witches to the utter delight of our superiors. I probed my fellow teachers about how odd I found it to be a Catholic school celebrating the day dedicated to things that go bump in the night. The teachers told me Halloween is a colossal ordeal in Taiwan. Every child dresses up and participates in “Tricks or Treets”. I smiled and nodded, chalking this oddity to “That’s the way we do it in Taiwan”.

On the day of Halloween first thru third grade came down to Kid’s Happy Land to play games and be given candy. Once inside the kids recited the following for the Happy Land teachers: “Tricks or Treets, smeeal my feets, give me somephing goods to eat, if you don’t, I don’t care, I will gibes you underwears.” I nearly wet my pants laughing. I thought this might be a fluke and only one class would say the Halloween rhyme for us. But to my shock and pleasure every class recited the rhyme for us. It was one of the funniest sights I had ever watched. This was even funnier than time Scott Landis set the roof of his mother’s house on fire one 4^th of July. I took pictures of the students decked out in their Halloween garb. Enjoy!

 Do you see Snow White?







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Angels in front... Demons in back.

The girl with the huge yellow bow is named Elaine. She is in 1st grade and very sweet. She told me that the bow was her crown.

 Jing-Xi’s Thought of the Day: Learning about another culture and far away land via the Internet, is not enough. One misses key subtleties learned only by visiting these places in person. This is clearly the case when one gets asked if every American marries their 1^st cousin and has the middle name Bob. Trick or Treat?  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

         

This girl is dressed up as a piece of candy. Wrappers and all.

Power Ranger, witch and some type of demon.

Superman throwing the peace sign.

Batman and Spiderman all in the same room. Who is out saving the day and catching the bad guys?

An angry bird and friend. I wasn't sure what this girl was dressed up as, but I know what she looks like. She is no older than the 3rd grade, in case anyone was wondering.

These are very white old students. Not really... This is Petier and Adrain, dressed as "Pumpkin Brothers". The one on the right is Petier, the slutty pumpkin. The one on the left is Adrain, the idiot pumpkin.

Not students. This is Rachel and Alexandra. The one on the right is Rachel, from the great state of Missouri. The one on the right is Alex, from Georgia, but her parents are Greece and Italy. All I have to say is WOW when it comes to Alex. :)  They are dressed up as Taiwanese single women. This is how the women dress here in hopes of wedding a foreign man.

War of the Worlds...

Suddenly a loud shriek pierced the quiet Sunday afternoon at the park. “What’s that?” a woman cries. A huge flying saucer hovered over the football field; an eerie beam of light came from the ship’s belly, and the entire U of O football team vanished. Just then Tom Cruise burst onto the scene to save the day. But then realized it’s U of O… Why waste his time on saving a team who wears such ugly colored uniforms…   

 The City Who Fights Back..

Riding along in the taxi this afternoon I had an epiphany. I instructed the driver; using one of my three blah blah phrases I mastered, to take me to Ai Mi, A-Mart in English. He replied Doy, yes, and we were on our way. The taxi weaved in and out of traffic with great proficiency and ease; the sad faced buildings stared back at me through the window. To gain an enhanced comprehension of the driving skills these taxi drivers possess imagine the heaviest traffic you have ever witnessed in your life time. Now add 10,000 additional pedestrians, scooters, busses, taxis, and/or cars. Everywhere you look there are various motorized vehicles or pedestrians playing chicken with the cars in the crosswalks.  This is the traffic in and around the city of Keelung. When a car honks its horn at you it’s a warning not just meant to make you aware of its presence, but a warning to remove yourself from its direct path or be run over. Just about every heavily traveled road in Keelung has crosswalks and signals which have a digital count down in bright yellow. The countdown begins its descent at 45. This is 45 seconds during which time pedestrians are allowed to cross the street. This also gives drivers an idea of when they will be able to end the wait at the red light and zoom away. However, the crosswalks really do not hold any type of special value to drivers and the people crossing in them even less. The traffic turning on the green light is not the only danger one is forced to struggle against. Imagine a sea of people, cars, and scooters for these taxi drivers to contend with and then add the stress they experience from the expectation of prompt delivery of their fare to said destination. The taxi driving in Taiwan is not just a skill, it’s an art form. Anyone seen the white rabbit?? Sorry about the trail. During the ride to Ai Mi the taxi driver would interrupt the deafening silence when he muttered aloud in blah blah, which probably were curse words. This is the epiphany part, in case you were wondering if I would be getting to this grand revelation. This city, Keelung, is wedged in between two separate worlds. There is the “old” world, with tradition and the old ways of living one’s life. Then there is the “new” world, which is jostling and jockeying position and new traditions. The taxi driver, who donned salt n pepper hair, seemed to straddle the two warring worlds with a simple ease. I only draw attention to the color of the driver’s hair to illuminate the following. The car this mature fellow was operating was a newer model Toyota and this ordinary looking taxi boasted modern conveniences not many American car owners are able to afford. It is no secret Americans over spend and are notorious for their longing to be noticed for their ability to “keep up with the Jones’” with no regard to the gravity of consequences. This competitive streak and the yearning to have the best with no concern for the cost is the reason Mainland China owns America, lock stock and smoking barrel. American’s do not deny their desires and other countries have grown to depend on this well-known fact. Such is the sad commentary on American greed and this greed is the motivating force behind driving a Lexis you can’t afford, owning a television with a screen bigger than a small country, and owning hand bags the price of which would have fed a family of five for an entire month in some countries. The phrase there is one born every minute springs to mind. The taxi was equipped with a five disk changer, which also played BlueRay, and viewing screens for the front and rear passengers. The driver was enjoying what appeared to be a “Blah Blah” version of “Leave it to Beaver”. I did not enjoy the reruns of this show when I was a child and this fact was not going to change based solely on subtitles and the women dressed in what I observed to be oriental moo moos. Not trying to point out the obvious, but leave it to blah blah quickly jumped the shark.

My attention turned to the scenery which seemed to skip past the car at mach 6. Every now and then we stopped for a red light and this gave opportunity to truly take in the sights. It has been said there is a 7-11 on every corner in America. If this is indeed the truth, there are at least two 7-11s on every block in Keelung. In addition and on the same block, they have a store called OK Mart, which is similar in kind to 7-11, but way less smelly. We passed towering modern meccas made of glass and steel. If you looked carefully you noticed traditional Buddhist temples huddled between the buildings. This affords the temples refuge from the surrounding environment and to take advantage of affluences the businesses provide daily. Quick food, as it is termed here, restaurants can be seen every place you turn. It is in this regard one can witness the stark juxtaposition between the old and new worlds. Quick food is beginning to take a position of prominence over the traditional foods cooked at home. Homemade family dinners are giving way to speed and convenience. Why would a working mother want to cook when she can have it delivered in 30 minutes or less, guaranteed? The correct answer here, in case you’re slow, is she wouldn’t want to cook. She is busy and has three children. She cleans the house, washes the clothes for five people, and listens to her husband complain incessantly. What makes you think cooking dinner is a priority after the type of day she survived.

 KFC, Pizza Hut, and Mc Donalds are an everyday sojourn for many people with the intention of snatching a bite on the run. Examples of the war being waged between the two worlds are everywhere one choose to take in a different aspect. The supermarkets sell traditional Chinese food ingredients in one isle and around the corner is the freezer section are the heat and eat “Real Italian Style” pizzas. You can always deifier how “traditional” the ingredients are by how insulting their odor is to your senses. The further down the traditional path one chooses to the skip the worse the smell. I do not even have the fortitude to stand at the trail head and gaze down the path. I happen to like my Sketchers very much and they would not be cute vomit colored. I will save the humorous “Real Italian Style” explanation for another blog. It seems like ease and convenience of the new world is moving in on the old world and is threatening to snuff it out of existence. The new world offers paperless maps that give you directions to anywhere you want to travel, although sometimes flawed and can cause death if one forgoes the use of common sense. The paperless map mounts to the dashboard and a sultry voice tells you bbllaahh bbllaahh. The new world way is better than the old method of getting around, plus a paper map could never make you feel wanted and loved. However, the paper map could double as toilet paper if you were lost and in need.  GPS units, bloothtooth headsets, IPhones, and IPods (complete with stand and radio connecter) can be found in every taxi cab. Most taxis also have some type of entertainment system providing the passengers entertainment and a distraction as the taxi driver takes their lives into his hands. Every taxi also sports the very traditional in origin religious statue/icon, prayer contrivance, good luck charm, and device, usually a chain and pendant, used for keeping ancestors happy and the ghosts far away. The two worlds are constantly warring for alpha status.

 

Jing-Xi’s Thought of the Day: Changing some parts of what one calls tradition can be beneficial. The parts of tradition which are not helpful or do not hold special value should be changed, thusly making the traditional acts retain true worth. The parts of tradition one does because it has always been should be evaluated and eradicated if found lacking in lesson. If one dances around the bonfire naked during winter solstice because it has always been, the tradition is sorely in need of evaluation. In Taiwan tradition is ever important, but some have forgotten why the tradition is kept and held in high regard. In addition some have lost the old ways altogether and replaced them with new ways. These new ways are permeating every aspect of culture and have trickled down into the educational system. The schools are teaching the students how to order combo meals correctly. The schools push this new way on the students so much they even teach what is called “The Fast Food Song”. I am sure there is a valuable lesson Taiwan should learn from America’s example. Childhood obesity is at an all-time high, but hasn’t affected these children. Yet..

 

 

Two is Always Better Than One...

Hhoopppeee Birrrsdayaa tue Euwww! Hhoopppeee Birrrrsaayaa tuuueee eeuuuwwww anda maneesa muurrraa! Thank you! I will be here all week. Please remember to tip your waiters and waitresses folks. Thank you and goodnight…

This is the phrase I kept anticipating was following the class’s singing. In most civilized parts of the world considered to be the Far East individuals have two birthdays. One birthday is their“small” birthday and the other, by means of elimination, would be termed their “big” birthday. When one of my favored students proclaimed to me a few days ago, “uhh today my “little” birthday, Teacher and I broughta theees (this) for youa” needless to say I was curious and confused. Mia handed me a little gift bag including a juice box, orange juice according to the picture accompanying the “blah blah” on the front, some type of what might be a cookie or cracker, and candy. Giving gifts to other people on one’s birthday in Taiwan is the “way we do it in Taiwan”. I am not certain if this way to celebrate a person is also practiced in other parts of Asia. I might have to teach in Japan next year to determine exactly how wide spread this birthday practice extends. I apologize, I am worse than Alice when it comes to following that darn White Rabbit. Shifting this exhortation forward…  Where was I? Oh yes, I remember now. Little birthday… Little birthday, I asked, what on God’s green earth is a little birthday? Mia dutifully embarked on her futile attempt to explain little birthdays versus big birthdays to me. She sighed and stated here in Taiwan, three words I have grown to loathe, everyone has two birthdays. She paused the explanation in order for her Taiwanese speaking brain to translate her thoughts into the English words necessary for me to understand. Fully comprehending her explanation, unfortunately, proved more difficult than trying to nail Jell-O to a wall. I gleaned only bits of solid information from our 10 minute chat on the way up to English class. I grasped here in Taiwan they have two birthdays, I put a hash mark in the “already knew that” column. I also understood one birthday was celebrated small and one was celebrated big. Again the hash mark was affixed firmly in the “already knew that” column. From that point the information I understood was unreliable, to say the very least, and I hadn’t placed one single hash mark in the column labeled “new information”. As we approached our classroom Mia told me to “hangs on” and she ran ahead of me and into the room. Since there are a large number of students, all wearing matching blue school uniforms, and having black hair I lost sight of Mia.

My Taiwanese co-teacher Judia greeted me as I unloaded my heavy bag from my person. I tapped into this rare gift a few seconds before the onset of English class to inquire about this whole birthday business. Judia thought for a couple seconds and expounded for me on Mia’s previous attempt to aid in my, what seemed to be daily, lessons about everything Chinese. She simply picked up her desk calendar and pointed out the two types of “monphs”. She also stated Chinese calendar doesn’t follow sun. I finished the next part of the discourse for her. I told her if the Chinese calendar does not follow the sun it must follow the only other heavenly body large enough to measure the passage of time, the moon. One would have thought I had discovered the location the ever illusive Fountain of Youth and brought her a small sip its water judging the manner in which she reacted to the addition of 1+1 in my brain. Needless to say, she was happy I understood her explanation.

Allow me to demystify the two birthdays in Taiwan. The Chinese follow what is called the Lunar Calendar. Yuup Skippy, this means they built their calendar tracking the moon’s movements. However, the balance of the world follows what is called the Gregorian Calendar, or simply a calendar that follows the sun’s movements. Two calendars equals two birthdays. The small and big terms are applied to the months in the lunar calendar. Due to weather and farming some months are “small” and some are “big”. The above is the extent of my understanding relating to the small and big terms used to refer to months in the lunar calendar. I even asked another native to explain the differences between the months and how their size is determined. I am ashamed to admit the additional clarification only muddied the waters further. However, celebrating two birthdays does sound very appealing, as long as the two birthday celebrations only add one year to your total age. Right?

Note of interest: If anyone wants to know when to celebrate their second birthday visit this site http://www.asia-home.com/china/cncaps.php  and follow the directions. The site calculates your lunar birthday and even gives you the animal who rules your birth year. If anyone is curious my lunar birthday is April 1^st and the Wood Tiger rules my year.   

Wood Tiger

 

Jing-Xi’s Lesson for the Day: The thought of celebrating two separate times to acknowledge one’s birth is an alien concept to me. The practice of giving gifts to others on one’s birthday is even more foreign. I believe this might be due to the feelings dread and despair that fills me as my birthday approaches every year. Observing the jubilation a birthday brings in this country, let alone two birthdays, has caused me to pause and consider my feelings about birthdays and even life itself. A birthday is reason to celebrate. Every person is special and adds their unique brand of crazy to this world. When my birthday circles around this year maybe I will apply the adage “this is the way we do it in Taiwan”, and send out birthday cards.       

This magic water will...

"So Jack handed the stranger the money he was supposed to use to purchase food. The stranger, in return, handed Jack three magic beans...

I recognize this story from somewhere. Where have I heard the words magic beans? I recollect it was from every person who has ever visited the numerous hot springs located on this island. They all return acclaiming the magical and healing powers these special waters poses. I remaine leery of strangers peddling “magic beans”.   

 Two weeks ago my friend Jim came down to where my desk is located to talk “American” and reminisce about home. Hearing “blah blah” starts to disrupt one’s inner serenity after being subjected to it for prolonged periods. I can hardly imagine what Jim must endure on a regular basis at home. One can only withstand listening to the Blah Blah Language for limited intervals and then crazy notions begin to take shape in your mind. For example, I wonder what would happen if I just dropped to the floor and faked a seizure. Would they stop the mind numbing blah blah long enough to see if I needed medical attention. Probably not… I could yell FIRE! I have always wanted to do that back home, but it is not permitted. Even yelling fire would not slow the continuous droning noise of their blah blah. If the monotonous hum of blah blah in normal tones doesn’t drive you to the brink of insanity, one only has to wait for the natives to become excited regarding the topic being discussed and the drone of blah blah becomes high pitched shrieks. It is this that pointed me to a theory regarding the extinct Lemmings. Basically the non blah blah lemmings jumped off the cliff so they no longer were subjected to the grating sound of the other lemmings speaking blah blah. Just a theory, mind you, could  have happened you know...

Jim and I conversed for a bit and as he was leaving to return to his classroom he stated a few of us “foreigners” are going to the hot springs, not next weekend, but the next. Would you like to come with us? I inquired where the springs were located, how we were going to travel there, and all other pertinent information. Most I was fishing for information on the type of food they served at this “resort”. I know this seems like a trivial motivation for considering not attending, but you have to understand what types of substances are termed foods in this country. Seriously… Jim assured me there was food, items even I would determine as food, and it would be fun. I agreed to attend the hot springs with the merry band of foreigners and Jim, he has been deemed in some respects, a local due to the fact he married a beautiful Taiwanese woman and can speak a little Chinese.

On Saturday Alex and I headed toward the bus station where we were meeting the others to travel to the hot springs together. Seven teachers from diverse countries were waiting for Alex, Jim, and I to show. Finally, we were all together and we meandered in the direction the bus stop where the #790 would whisk us away to our hot springs retreat. The promise of relaxation, rejuvenation, and succulent food was the theme of every conversation. The most pleasant portion of waiting for the bus was listening to conversations containing accents which were blah blah free.

The 790 arrived, in Taiwan you never really know if the busses are on-time or late due to the fact the signs and schedules are written in blah blah, and we boarded the bus. A short, bumpy, yet interesting ride in the direction of the ocean and we were in a new city. When we stepped off the bus the sun was shining and a sweet smelling breeze greeted us. We continued our trek from the bus stop on foot and Jim assured us the hot springs were nearby. Dialogues fixated on the hardships of teaching in Taiwan and camaraderie provided distraction and before we realized it we arrived at the stairs leading to the unassuming entrance of the hot spring resort. We arrived in the lobby and began investigating our surroundings trying to locate the check in. We mistakenly confused the lady behind the large counter for the person who procured the money required for day use of the facilities. We quickly discovered the person in charge of taking payment was located behind the caged window area. Back home you see women behind bars in very few locations. Vegas has ladies behind bars and glass in their exchange chips for real money place. Freaky gentlemen's clubs in New Orleans have ladies dancing in cages. I guess some men can only get a date if she is caged before hand. The only other place  that would have "ladies" behind bars would be prison. I am still not sure what the resort would be so worried about they would take this type of precaution. The lady behind the bars gladly accepted our money and even gave us a discount due to the fact we had 10 people in our group. The day use cost 265$NT. This sum is equal to less than 10$ USD. The bus ride to the resort was 30$NT, which is 1$ USD, so far the day had cost 11$ USD. The diminutive price for use of this subtly beautiful resort included use of the hot spring pools, the shower and changing rooms, one towel, and one bottle of water. This was where the lady behind the large counter motioned to our group and handed everyone their one towel and bottle of water.

 The water fall, complete with realistic jungle located directly behind, empties driectly into the warmer pool. The picture is a little fuzzy due to the huge scary bug landing on my foot. He scared me and I jumped. I didn't realize the picture was affected by the dumb bug.

This is the hot pool. The source of the hot spring is located not even a foot away from where it empties.

 This is the warm pool. This is the largest pool in size and has several sources of water which keep it pleasant and tepid. However, this pool is cold once you have been sitting in the hot pool for any amount of time.

Water from the source being funneled through a long pipe to ensure it cools off before it is allowed to mix with the water in the cooler pool. The water flowing out of the pipe can be compared to a shower.

This water flowing into the cold pool is piped a great distance. It is amazing how distance and plastic pipe can cool the water so much the pool is actually cold. Hard to believe this pool is usually unoccupied huh? 

The balcony over looks the cold pool and it's drangon head water outlets. These dragon heads are hand carved and made from the porous abrasive stones found at the hot spring source. The balcony looks out to the ocean, but we didn't get to see the view. The upstairs is reserved for the bathers who prefer to go a'natural. No saggy old blah blah men for this foreigner! Saggy speedo wearing men were enough...

Cold pool and view of the mountains.

The patio furniture pushed right up against the jungle. I was wondering what would happen if the jungle animals decided to rise up and protest? Scary thought when you consider the size of spiders they have in Taiwan alone. Remember Ivan?

Once properly dressed we parted the curtains separating the changing room from the pools and stepped out into what can only be described as a mankind taking advantage of nature. The concrete created a division between nature and luxury. On one side of the division was a breath taking jungle complete with butterflies and enormous leafed plants. On the other side was concrete walk ways and patio furniture. The two halves stood in stark contrast and I began to doubt the accounts of the magical properties of the hot springs. We located a table and dropped our one towel and bottle of water. There were four pools of water. One was located a little distance from the other three and we learned this was the “cold” pool. The other three pools were varying temperatures of “hot” pools. The largest of the three was warm like a pool in the middle of summer. The bottoms of the hot pools were carved from the naturally occurring stone from the hot springs. The second and smaller pool was warm like a hot bubble bath. The third and smallest pool was actually hot. The temperature of the water reminded me of a hot tub, hot but not unbearable. The water flowing into this pool was being filtered through various stones and was directly from the source of the hot spring. Our group settled into the warm and relaxing embrace of the third pool. The water had a coppery smell, but felt amazing. After three hours of soaking in this magic water we were pruney and hungry. We decided food sounded like a fantastic suggestion, the resort food was not to the standards which had been previously guaranteed. We left in search of decent food and to explore the city just to the right of the hot springs. The encounters we had on our adventure are coming soon in my next post.

 

Jing-Xi’s Lesson of the Day: Every person who is in control of their lucidity recognizes Urban Legends are just that, legends. These carefully and skillfully crafted stories are used for many purposes by people from every corner of the globe. The purposes for these tales range from encouraging children to eat their vegetables to keeping children from wandering into danger. However, sometimes these yarns are simply designed to entertain with their unbelievable, yet totally accurate elements. I believe Big Foot and visitors from other planets can be funneled into this category. However, some legends do hold a shred of veracity. The hot springs may not have possessed magical powers, but disbelief in their powers does not validate dismissing the whole legend as myth.